Thursday 20 February 2014

THESE ARE NOT YOUR FUNDAMENTALS: Review of Ken Wa Maria on Churchill live

I watched Churchill live Episode 49 a couple of weeks ago.

I enjoyed the show especially the part of Karis and Tanzanian Musician AY it was really hilarious.

However the interview with Ken Wa Maria really got me thinking... I know TV especially comedy and music is supposed to be fun and we are not  really supposed to think about it.
But on the flip side TV and music are a source of information, education and entertainment and it is a media that greatly shapes our perspective and view of life.
If you don't agree with me just think about the last time you read a book, watched an online/offline educational, motivational or life skill video or audio compared to the number of times you watch TV soaps, comedies, news(which is always bad) and then make your own conclusion which of these two categories color your life.

Back to Ken Wa Maria and Fundamentos. I respect Ken and his profession... however I think his thinking on life is flawed.
What he describes in his song as fundamentals of a man and fundamentals of a woman are a reflection of how we have devalued ourselves as human beings. This view of our "fundamentals" also is the cause of much unhappiness in our lives and the cause of strained, broken and abusive relationships.

Ken describes a man's fundamentals as

  1. The amount of land you have
  2. The car you drive
  3. The money you have in the bank
  4. Where do you live
  5. What is your position in the company

He describes a woman's fundamentals as

  1. Her ass
  2. Her hips
  3. Her boobs

Not so much from the woman's own perspective of these parts of her body but from the perspective of a perverted man and society. As he asks "what do you have to offer?"

WHY ARE THESE NOT YOUR FUNDAMENTALS?
Clearly in Ken's interview he places a high regard for "fundamentos" for the car he drives and even mentions that some of his jealous ex band members envy his Mercedes Benz and find they can't afford a Toyota Premio. He emphasizes a lot on his educational achievements too which he says he will use to progress in life. At some point he states "life is a competition".

Probably you have never heard of Alfred Merckle - A Forbes top 100 billionaire who ended his life by suicide on a train track when his fortune fell from $12 billion to $9 billion. Of course he went from top 100 to position 174. He had more "Fundamentos" than anyone you or Ken and I know.

My point is if land, the car you drive, money in your bank, your house, your company position are your fundamentals - if you lose them then you will have no meaning in life - you will kill yourself. If you lose control and your fortune plunges $4 billion in one year you won't see the $9 billion leftover you will be filled with fear and end this scary spiral (take your life). If your life is a competition "when do you win?" "who are the competition?" "what is the prize to be won? Fame? More Money? Sex? Power or Position?" "What will you do with the prize after you win it?" or will you wind up in an endless cycle of trying to preserve "your fundamentals" in order to keep the prize? It's a rat's life this kind of life and when its over it's a rats death

If a woman thinks her physical appearance matched against some criteria is her fundamentals then she is in for endless boob jobs, hip enhancements etcetera and if the criteria is changed by the criteria makers then she goes for slimming pills, forced gym workouts etcetera. If your fundamentals are warped belief of what consists of a beautiful body when life takes a toll on this body then insecurity sets in a fear that our spouse will see others who have "better fundamentos"; insecurity results in mistrust; mistrust results in strained relationships; divorce and break ups occur due to "wrong fundamentals".

Wrong fundamentals lead to unhappy people, who are continuously striving to have more, to meet others standards/approval, with a totally warped sense of self and self worth who lead stressful and strained lives to attain what is totally useless - this is the "vanity of vanities".

Here is something that Ken's Italian priests (who taught him music) might have taught him about life's fundamentals but he chose to ignore. The real fundamentals.

WHAT ARE YOUR FUNDAMENTALS?
Our prime identity can be described under two main headings - I am a child of God, I am human.

You are a child of God, a child of the universe you have a right to be here.
This fundamental is the appreciation that we do not hold the world in our hands is very important for a stress free life. We are able to be thankful for our lives and existence and to learn and grow from bad experiences or situations. We are tiny in the great scheme of things yet absolutely valuable, valued and unique.

You are human
This is fundamental helps us appreciate our unique endowments as human beings.
The first is knowledge (sing, dance, write, calculate, talk, listen) and the sum of all spatial, numerical, organizational and literary abilities we have.
The ability to love
The ability to choose or free will
The ability to follow through with a choice or willpower or the will
The ability to think and forecast and estimate the future
The sum of all feelings and emotions that only we are capable of.

WHO WE ARE COMES BEFORE WHAT WE HAVE
If you look at my list immediately above and Ken's list further up you realize that everything in Ken's list is "what we have" and is a result of "who we are" which is in my list.

An appreciation of "who we are" leads us to grateful and happy and confident lives. We know if we lose all our property we have it in us to create more wealth.

An appreciation of "who we are" helps us appreciate diversity in our differences there is no human being of a lower status than we are - we are different and unique and precious. Regardless of what we have in terms of property, wealth and acquisitions we are all equal in "Fundamentals"

 An appreciation of our identity prime as children of God makes us comfortable in whatever else we chose to do with ourselves i.e. minor identities. Whether we take up roles as fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, friends, lovers, religious, careers, state in life e.g. single, level of study.

An appreciation of the identity prime as human beings helps to comfortable in our minor identities and roles such as our career choices, career changes. Our secondary identity can change our prime identity never ever does/change.

Ken's fundamentals aren't bad - they are really good things but for these things to be truly meaningful to our lives we have to detach from them firstly - embrace our true fundamentals then all of Ken's list our wealth, money and looks will be a cause for us to be happy. We will be "happy about" these things because we are already "happy in" who we are.

Knowing our true fundamentals helps us lead lives of mindfulness
Knowing our true fundamentals helps us be grateful lives

Leading grateful and mindful lives makes us happy people
Being happy people leads us to be successful people.

Sad fact of life many of us want to do it the other way round - get success so that they can be grateful and happy.

Choice is yours